There is a subtle, yet powerful, lie that once crept into my mind and undermined my peace and joy as a homemaker, and I want to share what that is so that you don’t fall into the same trap. Even today, this disposition towards managing the home can sneak in through the back door of my mind if I leave it wide open and unguarded. But good news, while this mindset has the ability to wreak havoc, when the lights turn on we can see that it’s only a wimpy little pest that can easily be ushered right back out the door.

A rhythm for the home is not a law to keep.

When we have great aspirations to better manage our homes, it can be tempting to look at our plans as if they are a law that we must adhere to, or else. The best of intentions can end up leaving us with a heavy burden that we were never meant to bear, because of the weight we place on our own expectations. This especially bubbles up to the surface when life happens and derails our plans for the day.

So how might this play out in the day? Younger, pregnant me would get a spark of inspiration (usually from some combination of a night of better sleep + exasperation from the mess that comes with small children) and jot down a new (and packed) “routine” of how I thought the day should go so that I could finally get it all done. I would wake up, look at the plan, and could probably keep up with it for a few days, until a child threw up. Or the inevitable squabbles happened, which sent me into a tizzy because I had big important things to do!

Rather than letting the plan guide me, I had fallen into the trap of seeing it as a checklist that I had to get to. The plan didn’t serve me. Deep down, I found myself enslaved to the plan as if it were a law. But that is not the purpose of having a plan. When done right, having a plan can actually have an opposite effect. Rather than binding, it can be liberating.

Home rhythms serve to answer one question.

A thoughtful plan for the home is not meant to be burdensome, but greatly helpful because of the nature of our roles. Between the nurturing, cooking, cleaning, discipling, organizing, planning, financing, and all of the other “-ings” of the home, there is a lot to keep up with. And it can be hard to know when “enough is enough”, or what to prioritize. Because of this, we need a plan to help us know one thing: What’s next?

That’s it. A rhythm (AKA, the plan or routine) is not a list to strive to keep up with. A rhythm is a well-thought out cadence to the day or week that helps you manage all of those moving pieces of the home.

When a rhythm is formed based on your season of life, your home, and your family’s God-given priorities, it can be tremendously helpful. Because it tells you what the next best thing to do is during your day, and helps you be a good steward of your time and home, for the glory of God and the good of your people.

Next week, I'm going to share the practical side of this, including how I use the "Three Priority Rule" to keep shiny-object syndrome out of my home management (most of the time). Keep an eye out for that one.